During these unprecedented difficult times, it may be difficult to see the glass half full. Fear, anxiety, depression, and discouragement may take over your positive thinking. All sorts of unhelpful thoughts may take control of your mind and influence your clear thinking and behavior.
“You are not good enough”, “You won’t ever get that job, so why bother”, “You have been made redundant so there is no future for you” or “we won’t ever make it through this Pandemic”, are some of the thoughts you may be listening to recently. Imagine seeing yourself going over these thoughts over and over again, can you see what damage they would to you? Slowly day by day, and week by week, they will get a hold of you and grind you down and make you feel upset, anxious, angry, guilty, lonely, etc.
As Martin Luther said, “You cannot keep birds flying over your heads but you can keep them from building a nest in your hair”, you can’t keep negative thoughts from arising, but you can certainly keep them from nesting in your mind. So, what can you do to keep thinking positive during challenging times? I will share five steps that will help you cultivate positive thinking and block unhelpful thoughts before they can influence you negatively and hijack your present and future life.
1. Label the thought. When a helpful thought enters your mind, before you get caught up in it, what you need to do is label it for what it is, just “another unhelpful thought”. Once you have labeled it then you should repeat to yourself that it is not the truth and that you are not playing this game anymore. As you do this, this thought will immediately lose its power.
2. Leave it alone. Now that you know what it is, turn your back to it, don’t challenge it, don’t argue with it, just let it be. By doing this you will break the cycle for this thought to go around your head. Unhelpful thoughts love attention so, stick in a corner and it will eventually shut up.
3. Stand up to it. Don’t let this thought boss you around. Remember, this is just a bad thought, it’s not the truth. Just like any other bully it will go away once you stand up to it. If the thought says “don’t” then “do”, if it says “can’t” say “can”.
4. Give yourself a break. Sometimes you say things to yourself that you wouldn’t even say to a friend. So, if you have bad thoughts think what someone you love would say to you. You would be surprised that they disagree with you and that they don’t think “you are not good enough” or bound to fail. Bad thoughts tell lies, people you love tell the truth.
5. Look at the situation differently. Imagine that one of your friends is experiencing this, what advice would you give? You could then give the same advice to yourself. Couldn’t you? You can also speak with other people to ask how the deal with this problem and learn from them.
In conclusion, I hope you can master this technique to deal with unhelpful thoughts that can make you feel miserable and keep you from thinking positively about yourself and therefore, feeling confident that you are in charge of your life and to stay positive during tough times like this one you are leaving now.
